The Worst Election Campaign in Australian History
I am kicking back on a Saturday night having a few beers and watching the AFL, my usual routine after the kids have been bathed and ready for bed.
As I take a sip from my scrumptious bottle of Hoegaarden and sink further into the comfort of my couch, I start to think about the fact there is only three weeks left until the Federal Election. Three weeks to decide who is going to run this proud country. Will I vote for Kevin Rudd or Tony Abbott? Will my vote be Labor or Liberal? Then it hits me.
One of Kevin Rudd and Tony Abbott are going to win without convincing the nation they are the right choice to lead. Hear me out as I ramble a bit (I am on my third 4.9% Hoey as I write this) because it is doing my head in.
With three weeks to go, neither Rudd or Abbott has come out and stated “I am the man to lead this country forward. These are the policies that I will introduce and I stand by each and every one of them. I believe in this wonderful country and you need to believe in me. I might not be the best Prime Minister but I will do whatever it takes to put this country back on track”. They have both ducked, dodged and bored us to death with a campaign that has been as exciting as a soggy fart.
Here is an example of the shite we have to deal with. Liberal candidate James Diaz is promoting the ‘Six Point Plan” to stop the boats which is a key election promise from the Liberals. There was a small problem with James’ delivery of the SPP and I wonder if you can pick what it was:
Thats right, he has no bloody idea what they are! Yes, let us vote this bloke in. He looks like a reputable character that will send this county in the right direction. FLOG!
What about the great white hope Tony Abbott, who will win the election and se the country back on track. Let’s take a look at someone who wants to represent Australia globally:
Did he say suppository? He won’t talk shit, he will just jam something up his clacker to win the election!
Here is another ‘politically correct’ attempt at swinging the voters, this time talking about one of his female candidates:
Yep, I want this bloke representing us at the United Nations. Another Dad joke from Abbott (and the Sunrise crew take the non-funny WAYYYYY too far as usual).
What about Rudd? His main focus is not about how to stop the boats or how to put the budget back in surplus, but to see how many ‘selfies’ he can take over the campaign. Check this out:
These two muppets cannot be serious can they? I am pissed off! Bring back the days of Howard & Hawke; two blokes who talked the talk and walked the walk.
I wrote a number of months ago that I won’t be voting for anyone because both parties are incompetent. From what I have seen since I don’t think my opinion has changed.
As I write this and head into my fourth and final Hoey (damn it is a good beer) my typing, grammar and train of thought are slightly skewed. But my mind is clear as day as I think about the dark days that this country will be going through after September 7th when one of these two butt-pirates will be in the top job. God help us!
Let me know your thoughts on this post or the election in general in the comments section below.